The final post on my iPod

Technology changes with each season, and apps that were depended on in the past have fizzled like morning dew.

Why o why has blogger gone awol?

I can't find a blog app I like as well and am giving away my iPod so this app will no longer function, as in wiping memory rom this device.

A sad moment of silence for the catching of ones breath to match the tide of the catching up of the world of technology. With cars racing on the speedway, I am taking this exit to rest. 

Hope to find you on the other side. 

May you be well and in peace. 

Don't forget to breathe.

A mighty winged entourage

A mighty winged entourage comes swiftly on the hills

The sunrise sweeps the dusk away 

The ocean drinks the swills

Surrounding trees persuade the gulf to dry her tears in love

A gentle breeze removes the stains, her cheeks were blazoned from

This dawning day has words of hope and muscle for the bone

The wind calls forth her fingers dance to face the wind alone

But not alone, for You are here, in memory and form

So twas it was and so shall be we do not roam alone

This heart a well of song and truth these shattered dreams to hold

So run to You a slave to Love 

These seconds shall You hold

Be pierced o heart and listen not to torments in the sea

For yonder comes the valley mist 

In all these moments be.

11/7/18

God of the Breakthrough

God, You are the God of the breakthrough.
All things are possible with You.
You are the God who moves mountains.

You make all things, holding life and matter in Your hands.
Nothing exists apart from You.
Nothing can be created apart from You.

You take a dream, a word, and a breath and release them into something living and dancing before You.
You laugh.
You dance with Your creation.

You and that which You formed laughing and dancing together.
In a snowy wood that You created.
You, Adonai, are the only One.
There is none but You.
Everything submits to Your Name.
I thank You for every breakthrough You have brought. My past. My present. My future.
I thank You for the breakthroughs that I don’t always have faith for, but You do.
I thank You that I can be like the snow dancing in the woods.

I know that when I land, I land on soft snowdrifts that just keep getting bigger.

Rising up. One flake, two. Fluttering. Dancing. Falling. Building into mountains.
Things only God could dream of.
And I’m part of Your mighty mountain.
I’m mesmerised by Your beauty, O Lord.
I’m captivated by Your power and might.
I’m undone by Your majesty, Ruler of the Universe.
I’m swept up in Your Tremendous Love.
Thank You that You are You, and that I am me.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Shabbas

It's Shabbas in Jerusalem.

This one in particular feels like Christmas. There's a chill in the air for the first time since February. The frankincense in my candle burner fills the apartment with richness. I'm snuggled in an oatmeal sweater I bought at the Fremont three weeks ago during a Seattle cold spell. Seattle shores, Maine rugged coastline, New York City and farm towns. So much stimulation for my senses and heart, in my recent whirlwind Stateside visit. Now, back in this beautiful Holyland, after the bustle of Rosh Hashanah has just passed by like a boisterously wonderful parade on a rainy day. I'm filled with traces of nostalgia for everywhere and nowhere all at once. My senses awakened to old familiars long forgotten. 

And this Shabbat, alone and very quiet, makes me want to instinctively grab for the phone, the laptop, any distraction from the silence. I was surrounded day and night with family and friends from the east to the west of America. And now, in that sudden wake, this new stillness feels very still. Solitary. 

We were, indeed, built for company. Our Creator did not make us to be so quiet and hidden. In fact, He made us so that He would have a family. He is driven by relationship in everything He does. Why is it that we mortals strive so hard to make for ourselves large sandcastles to lock ourselves away from the world in, when our souls desperately long for love? We need each other. We live and breath for each other's company.

Shabbat is truly beautiful when shared with those you cherish and God at the center.

Thank you, Adonai, for a holy day of rest. May I learn deeper waters of Shabbat, and please let me be surrounded by those with whom I want to make memories forever.

Amen.

Under an Olive Tree

Sitting under an olive tree in Jerusalem. 

Dozens of olives cover the shaded soft grass under the tree. Too soon they fell, unripe, unfit for eating. Here they will decay until they become part of the earth once more. 

Fruit is dependent on the timing. As we trust God to know the perfect timing for all things we hope and trust for, he will harvest in its season. We must content ourselves with waiting on the tree, for if we shake too violently under the pressure of waiting, we find ourselves on the ground, unfit for his plans for us, hidden under decaying leaves instead of ripening in his son.

Be encouraged. Hold unswervingly to the hope you profess. Without wavering. 

For he who promised IS faithful.

Heb 10:23

Pray for the peace of Jerusalem

I have been in God's holy land for a month of prayer. 

Friends, you are the salt and light to the nations. Stand for righteousness. Speak for God's truth. Stand against sin and corruption. "A dead fish floats with the stream but a living fish has the strength to go against it."

And please pray for the peace of Jerusalem.

Letting go

Today was hard. I let go of more things. Specifically, my car. The car I drove to Maine in, back and forth across upstate New York in for six years. The car I meandered to mountains and lakes and hiking posts and country drives with Duncan riding shotgun. Praying in the Spirit over geographic territories at the top of my lungs and full fervor, while Duncan bobbed his lolling tongue in the breeze, his brown ears flapping wildly. I drove eighty thousand miles of singing, praying, laughing, exploring, most of them with Duncan tagging along Mommie.

Today I took my car for my final ride, to Schenectady to a friend's car lot who will try to sell it for me. I need the money, and I don't expect to need a car in the States anytime soon, as I know I am called by God to the nations. Still, however, it doesn't make it easier to l e t  g o.  Things get a hold of us, our trust, our navigation tool, and the great unknown ahead of me. I know it will be good, wonderful in fact. But I let go of one hand while the other opens toward heaven ready to pick whichever fruit is presented.

Today, I also packed up my apartment. All my cozy things are packed in storage. I'm left with the cold reminder that I can't get too comfortable, and I will have to say goodbye more often than I would like, in this life I've been called to.

I'm sitting in a mostly-empty apartment, with no car waiting for me in the driveway. The reminders and ghosts of the past driven away, swept away with the autumn leaves, as I like them drift forward and await the next season.

Heron

God brought me a tall white heron today, in answer to a prayer for confirmation.

#sohappy

Trusting

This is the end of a very long three weeks. God opened a suddenly door for me to step in as a spanish teacher in a catholic school for twelve days, writing curriculum and teaching grades pre-k through 8th, with hand puppets, songs, videos, textbooks and stories. Students begged fore to tell them bible stories, and I ended classes with rich and colorful bible lessons and testimonies of faith and collective prayers and Holy Spirit encounters. Add to this busy season another suddenly- that of being accepted as a part of a missions organization and also suddenly plans to embark on an international trip in less than a month. So, while teaching ten different levels of spanish full days as the pinch hitter maestra, I was moonlighting by writing and mailing support letters, making calls and setting meetings with ministry partners, running to doctors for travel vaccinations. Plus a brand new laptop to lean fast how to use plus the software programs that continue to be new to me. 

In the most of this, cleaning out storage from a house and rising before roosters for two consecutive garage sales which, though very successful, caused me some heartache as I said goodbye to nearly all my possessions. Add to thy an untimely respiratory infection. 

Enter the seed for a nasty little thing called striving. 

It's easy to see how striving slithers in to throw priorities off and divert our gaze.

Striving is a fragile stronghold like a spiderweb that can hardly be seen but upon which whole foundations can be built or destroyed. My countless tasks, though rooted in good intentions, can be diverted to striving worry anxiety if I'm not careful. I am reminded to keep my eyes on Jesus, lest I sink. I've stepped out of the boat; but now to not look upon the waves. 

Eleven disciples did not step out of the boat. Often we think of Peter and criticize his lack of faith in sinking and crying out Lord, Lord. But we forget that eleven others sat there gawking, frozen in their wooden plank seats, toes fixed firmly on the floor and knuckles grasping oars in the stormy sea, afraid to let go of the oars, let alone rise up and plunge over the side into the black turbulence.

I feel like Peter in the turbulent water. I see Jesus straight ahead. His hand is reaching out to me. Come, daughter. Come. His smile and his bright eyes illuminate the darkness. There is no fear in him.

For all the things that need to still happen shall come to pass. I shall not fear. 

My assignments here have borne great fruit. Ninety-one students surrendered their lives to Jesus and invited him into their hearts during my short stint. They met with the Holy Spirit for the first time and were overtaken by his electrifying power. 

The hurdles will always be there, but the selahs will need to be purposefully made to rest in.  I need to breathe knowing He is in total control and will continue to lead me.

I'm tired. I'm ill. I'm beyond exhausted.  Im elated and super excited for this trip. 

I need only look in his eyes.

All else will fade away. 

He is here.

My Lord, my rabbi, my Friend.

On a limb

Waiting in expectation

For the miracles;

On the edge of a knife

an eleven fifty-nine clock

And a promise about to ring

A promise of the call of a good father

To show up and sweep me off my feet

To tend my scratches and kiss my spent muscles as I collapse

Heavy and spent,

My mind stills before His grace

My heart yields to His white light

My spirit circles and lays to rest in His glow

Like a house dog cosying to her master

I am waiting His miracles

Looking for His fireworks that only He can do

Going to the promised land, 

going to hold His hand and follow where He leads

I shall dance like David and worship-,

To pray to ignite to burn-,

To hope, to listen-,

To love.

The winter is gone and the springtime comes. I'm quickened to the meadow.

I wish only to be where He calls me 

I know my small hand is in His firm grasp.

Boot Camp

Did you ever feel like you were on the edge of a storm waiting for the thunder to clap and the deluge to start flooding down? You know, the feeling you get in your bones when a heavy storm's about to pass over. For much of my life I've been a human barometer, reading the weather forecast accurately from dull aches in my bones that morphed from childhood injuries into guideposts for when the snow would fly. Lately my spirit has been reading the barometric pressure spiritually, so to speak. I have been keenly aware that it is coming- the storm of a lifetime- and it will be a tsunami of epic proportions to sweep up many unexpectedly. 

These past three months being back home have felt like boot camp where I've been getting trained up, filled up, and put through the wringer in intense preparation for what is about to transpire soon. It feels like a little bit of a rest between assignments but mostly a sacred timeout of training. I fall into bed tired and spent each night. Days are full of the school of the spiritual lessons The Lord wants to teach me. 

I'm getting ready. My sword is getting sharpened. The chinks in my armour are hammered smooth. Mending and strengthening the armour, speaking a lot with the Commander of the Armies, expecting my deployment at any time. To where, He hasn't shown me yet. He wants to know I will wait and trust and obey. God knows too well if I had the whole blueprint from His hands I would run ahead of Him. Neither He nor I want me to do that. For the safest place I can be is in the center of His will for me. 

My bags are packed. I'm selling anything that isn't nailed down. I know I need money, enough to fly wherever He calls me and stay there as long as He tells me. I'm trusting The Lord for all my needs. I'm trusting that when He whispers to me my next assignment, He will supernaturally bring in the resources needed, either through His storehouses, or through whatever means He chooses. I'm expecting; I'm ready.

Who will go for me? Says The Lord.

Lord, send me. Send me.

Guideposts

We go back and read the signs that we passed when we think we've lost our way--we go back and make sure we took the turn in the road we were meant to.  Lately the enemy has been pounding against me with lies, doubt, anxiousness, fear. None of which sticks to my armour but some of the ooze of the rubber darts lingers until a fresh rain of the Holy Spirit comes.

I am needing a fresh rain.

Consider it pure joy when you face trials and persevere. You will lack nothing. Blessed is the man who perseveres. He will receive a crown of life. In Galatians we are reminded that as a man does, he reaps. If you sow seeds of fear and unbelief, your life will reflect that. If you sow seeds of faith, however, your life and works will produce an abundant tree. It is The Lord who brings in the crop; we merely sow and till and plow where He tells us.

Do not grow weary in your faith. Love well and take care of the family of believers. Their faith may be shaken while yours is strong. Theirs may be strong while yours is shaken. 

Let us consider how we may encourage one another on toward love and good deeds. Hebrews 10:24

Strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. Hebrews 12:12

Take the ways that are firm. When you ask God, do not doubt. But believe. James 1:6

As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without action is dead. James 2:26

Abraham's faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. A person is justified by what she does--and not by faith alone. James 2:22-24

The prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; The Lord will raise him up. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective! James 5:15-16

I am Sarah's daughter if I do what is right and do not give way to fear. 1 Peter 3:6

Therefore, brothers and sisters in faith, do not be discouraged. God is faithful and true. He will not forsake you. He has carved you on his hand. He will see to it that his plans succeed. Sow in faith in what is possible; and God will raise up a standard to do what is impossible. If he called you to it, he will see it accomplished. Stand firm, therefore, and do not give in to the yoke of slavery to fear or unbelief. But, believe!